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Home >> Buffy The Vampire Slayer Cast >> I've Got A Theory
Album: Buffy Musical

I've Got A Theory

GILES
I've got a theory
That it's a demon
A dancing demon!
No, something isn't right there.

WILLOW
I've got a theory
Some kid is dreaming
And we're all stuck inside his wacky Broadway nightmare

XANDER
I've got a theory
We should work this out

ANYA, GILES, WILLOW, AND XANDER
It's getting eerie
What's this cheery singing all about?

XANDER
It could be witches!
Some evil witches!
Which is ridiculous 'cause witches they were persecuted and Wicca good and love the earth and woman power and I'll be over here.

ANYA
I've got a theory!
It could be bunnies!

(Silence. Crickets chirping.)

TARA
I've got a -

ANYA (belting)
Bunnies aren't just cute like everybody supposes!
They've got them hoppy legs and twitchy little noses!
And what's with all the carrots?
What do they need such good eyesight for anyway?
Bunnies!
Bunnies!
It must be bunnies!
(Pyrotechnics.)
...Or maybe midgets.

WILLOW
I've got a theory we should work this fast -

WILLOW AND GILES
Because it clearly could get serious before it's passed.

TARA
I've got a theory -

BUFFY
It doesn't matter...
What can't we face if we're together?
What's in this place that we can't weather?
Apocalypse?
We've all been there
The same old trips
Why should we care?

BUFFY, ANYA, GILES, TARA, WILLOW, AND XANDER
What can't we do if we get in it?
We'll work it through within a minute
We have to try
We'll pay the price
It's do or die

BUFFY
Hey, I've died twice.

BUFFY, ANYA, TARA, WILLOW, AND XANDER
What can't we face if we're together?

GILES
What can't we face?

BUFFY, ANYA, TARA, WILLOW, AND XANDER
What's in this place we can't weather?

GILES
If we're together...

BUFFY, ANYA, TARA, WILLOW, AND XANDER
There's nothing we can't face

ANYA
...Except for bunnies.

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